Animal Talmudika / Watch out for the Bite, the Sting, and the Hiss of the Biblical Prophets

Beware [of the Prophets]...for their bite is the bite of a Fox, their sting is the sting of a Scorpion, their hiss is the hiss a Serpent, and all their words are like fiery coals.

- Pirkei Avot (Ethics of the Fathers) 2:10

Animal Talmudika / Sarcasm of the Serpent

At some future time all the animals will gather and question the Serpent: 'The Lion attacks and devours; the Wolf tears and consumes; what advantage do you possess''? And the Serpent will answer them: 'What advantage is given those who over-use their tongue?'

- Babylonian Talmud, 'Arachin 15b

Animal Talmudika / Dreams of the Donkey

If one sees a Donkey in a dream, he may hope for salvation, as it says, 'Behold thy king cometh unto thee, he is triumphant and victorious, lowly and riding upon a Donkey.'

- Babylonian Talmud, Berakoth 56b

Why is Anal Sex Called Sodomy? Jewish Midrash (Genesis Rabbah) Provides the Answer...

Rabbi Menahema said in Rabbi Bibi's name: "The Sodomites made an agreement among themselves that whenever a stranger visited them they would forcibly rape him anally and then rob him of his money; even him of whom it is written, 'That they may keep the way of the LORD, to do righteousness and justice', they would use him like a beast of burden and rob him of his money."

- Midrash, Genesis Rabbah 50

Meaning of the Names of the Babylonian Talmud's Seven Heavens

 

 

The Seven Heavens of Judaism

1) Wilon: Curtain
2) Rakia: Expanse, firmament
3) Shehakim: Clouds, dust
4) Zebul: Elevation, height, lofty abode, Temple
5) Ma'on: Dwelling, habitation
6) Makon: Fixed or established place, residence

7) ‘Araboth: to be dark, in darkness 

 

 

SOURCE: Babylonian Talmud, Chagigah 12b, Soncino Edition

The Cutest Animal Talmudika to Date...

‘Why does a Dog know its owner while a Cat does not?’ Rabbi Eleazar answered them: ‘If he who eats something from which a Mouse has previously eaten loses his memory, think how much more memory will be lost by the animal which eats the Mouse itself!’

- The Babylonian Talmud, Horayoth 13a

The Talmudic Wisdom of Keeping Baskets and Serpents Separated

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No one can live with a Serpent in the same basket.

 - Babylonian Talmud, Kethuboth 72a


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Beware of the stuffed toy animal Snake!

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No one can live with a Serpent in the same basket.

- Babylonian Talmud, Kethuboth 72a

The Seven Holy Maccabees and the Talmud

One example of the Judeo-Christian tradition are the Seven Holy Maccabees. Not only are they official Saints of Christianity assumed to reside in the Christian Kingdom of Heaven, they are also revered in the Talmud as the following citation clearly shows:

This refers to the woman and her seven sons. They brought the first before the Emperor and said to him, 'Serve the idol.' He said to them: 'It is written in the Law, I am the Lord thy God.' So they led him away and killed him.

They then brought the second before the Emperor and said to him, 'Serve the idol.' He replied: 'It is written in the Torah, Thou shalt have no other gods before me.' So they led him away and killed him.

They then brought the next and said to him, 'Serve the idol.' He replied: 'It is written in the Torah, He that sacrifices unto the gods, save unto the Lord only, shall be utterly destroyed.' So they led him away and killed him.

They then brought the next before the Emperor saying, 'Serve the idol.' He replied: 'It is written in the Torah, Thou shalt not bow down to any other god.' So they led him away and killed him.

They then brought another and said to him, 'Serve the idol.' He replied: 'It is written in the Torah, Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one.' So they led him away and killed him.

They then brought the next and said to him, 'Serve the idol.' He replied; 'It is written in the Torah, Know therefore this day and lay it to thine heart that the Lord He is God in heaven above and on the earth beneath; there is none else.' So they led him away and killed him.

They brought the next and said to him, 'Serve the idol.' He replied: 'It is written in the Torah, Thou hast avouched the Lord this day … and the Lord hath avouched thee this day; we have long ago sworn to the Holy One, blessed be He, that we will not exchange Him for any other god, and He also has sworn to us that He will not change us for any other people.' The Emperor said: 'I will throw down my seal before you and you can stoop down and pick it up, so that they will say of you that you have conformed to the desire of the king.' He replied; 'Fie on thee, Caesar, fie on thee, Caesar; if thine own honour is so important, how much more the honour of the Holy One, blessed be He!'

They were leading him away to kill him when his mother said: 'Give him to me that I may kiss him a little.' She said to him: 'My son, go and say to your father Abraham, Thou didst bind one son to the altar, but I have bound seven altars.' Then she also went up on to a roof and threw herself down and was killed. A voice thereupon came forth from heaven saying, 'A joyful mother of children.' R. Joshua b. Levi said: "The verse, 'Yea, for thy sake we are killed all the day long' can be applied to circumcision, which has been appointed for the eighth day."

- Babylonian Talmud, Gittin 57b

May the LORD God bless you in the name of the Maccabees.